Part 3: The World Tree


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Seven years ago, I woke up in the middle of the night and felt a feminine presence at my side.

I didn’t know who or what she was at the time, but I would later identify her as my patron goddess.

“The earth is life,” she said to me. “Be not afraid. I am for you. I am with you.”

And then…we were in a dream together.  And in that dream, I confessed to her, “I think I have the power to fly.”

“You CAN fly,” she said, “You just can’t be afraid to jump.”

Weeks later, as I was waking up one morning, I heard her whisper the following words:

“My Father has created a portal through which souls can move on to the next world when they are ready to leave this one. You know the path that lies before you. Jump soon!”  

I went cold.

A portal for souls who are ready to leave this world?

I know the path before me?


It sounded like an invitation to commit suicide.

“No, thanks,” I said.  “My life’s not easy, but things aren’t that bad.”

She never spoke these words to me again, and for seven years, I tried to find an alternative path – the path that would make life easier to bear.

My biggest lead was the Kaballistic Tree of Life, which I studied in Guatemala for four months.  I felt a deep affinity towards the Tree.  It wasn’t just a symbol to me; it felt alive – like it could speak to me. I thought that if I could unlock its secrets, I’d be able to reach higher and higher states of consciousness until I found my life’s purpose.

The Tree showed me many things, but when my studies ended, I still didn’t have the answers I was looking for. I grew disenchanted with the Tree, and when I left Guatemala, I took all my notes and sealed them up in a box.

And all the while, I could feel my patron goddess with me, hovering over me.  She never judged or condemned me.  She just sent me wave after wave of unconditional love.

Gradually, over the years, that love wore me down, like drops of water wearing away stone.

And now, totally broken and with no where left to turn, I prayed to her:  “I don’t want to keep fighting you. The truth is…I love you. I am so afraid to love you, but I do. And if you want me to serve you, to be your devotee, I’ll do that.”  I even started doing research on what sort of offerings I could make to her, and what a shrine to her should look like.

Then later I had a dream. I was standing at the foot of a tree, whose fruit had fallen to the ground.

I picked up a piece of fruit.  It turned into the head of my patroness. The expression on her face was one of sadness. Something was wrong. Something was…incomplete.

The next night, I had the exact same dream, and felt the same sense of incompleteness about it.

I woke up from these dreams, deeply troubled.  Hadn’t I surrendered to her? Wasn’t that what I was supposed to do?  What was I missing?

Using a visualization technique that I’d learned from lucid dreaming books, I imagined myself back in the dream.  There I was, standing at the foot of this tree, staring at the fruit.

I picked the fruit up. I tucked it under my arm.

Then I looked at the tree.

I felt an urge to merge with it.

To climb it.

But why climb it?  What was up there?  Why did I…?

Within an instant, everything clicked, like lock tumblers falling into place.

“My Father has created a portal through which souls can move on to the next world when they are ready to leave this one. You know the path that lies before you. Jump soon!”

“HOLY SHIT!” I yelled, grabbing my head with both hands.  “The portal!  That’s what she was talking about!  The Tree!!! THE TREE IS THE PORTAL!!!”

It has been in front of me this whole time.

She wasn’t talking about suicide. She was talking about soul flight!

She was talking about traveling up the Axis Mundi. 

The Axis Mundi is a central feature of world mythology.  A giant tree or a mountain which represents the metaphysical corridor that connects all the different dimensions in our universe.

The number of dimensions vary, depending on the mythology, but they’re usually divided up into three major worlds:



The celestial plane. The home of gods, angels, and benevolent spirits




The world you and I live in and its astral counterpart




The dwelling place of nature and animal spirits and/or the realm of the dead.



With the proper training, a person can master the art of astral projection. They can leave their physical body at will and “fly” up and down the Axis Mundi – The World Tree – moving from one dimension to another.




Yggdrasil, the World Tree from Norse mythology


But why? Why do this?  What was the point?  Sight-seeing?  Bragging rights? What difference did it make whether or not I figured out how to do this?

Then the final piece of the puzzle came to me – it was the memory of a dream I’d had long ago.

I was standing on a cliff overlooking the ocean. I saw little lights flying off in the distance.  They were souls, and they were all circling a very massive bright light.

But near me, on the ground, was the soul of a woman, wandering by herself.  She looked frightened. Scared.

I got her attention and pointed to the massive light.  “Go there,” I said. “That’s where you belong.”

She thanked me and flew off to join the others.

She was a soul who had been ready to leave this world and move on to the next one.

She just didn’t know the way.  She’d gotten lost.

She needed a psychopomp.

“This is crazy,” I mumbled to myself, my eyes filling with tears.  “It’s crazy.  It can’t be true.  I want it too much to be true.  Even if it is true, I’d have to be able to find the Axis Mundi, and I don’t know where it is.”

But even as I said these words, I knew that I had a map.


The Kabbalistic Tree of Life


The map was inside of me.  It’s inside of everyone.

And so is the door.

“So God created humankind in his image,
in the image of God he created them
male and female he created them.”
(Genesis 1:27)

“As above, so below, as within, so without, as the universe, so the soul…” (Hermes Trismegistus)


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